My face isn't carved in a mountain. I've never been struck by lightning.
I've never saved a crying baby from a burning house fire nor have I over come my misfortunes in life to acquire a name for myself. I consider myself a writer although all I've written is only pieces of torn limbs of my distraught existence. (a bunch of poems)
The question now is where is safe?
The tragedy at Sandy Hook elementary school could leave doubt any where is safe. In fact if you look back at the year 2012 shooters targeted malls, villains targeted movie theatres.
Earth quakes, tsunami's even war has a little more understanding than these senseless killings.
We try and prepare for tornadoes or fires to save lives. We have students running drills. Understanding evacuation plans and procedures. The question isn't who's on first? Or whats on second? The question now is where is safe? Where is our security blanket? Shouldn't we feel that our professionals our Judges, Sheriffs, police, council members and government officials don't they have it all under control?
Have you been in a court building lately? They have guards and metal detectors at the door protecting their own security. Thursday March 13 the daily telegrams lead story "county ID policy stopped" it was stopped partly because three council members failed to show up for the vote. The telegram reports the biggest objection on the ID policy was from the prosecutors office over concern the badges could make their employees a target of violence. Their professionalism will lead to violence toward them? our public officials have their own security at interest. their own agenda. Weather it be a radicalized Citizen a disgruntled co worker or a crazy gamer what's the answer to the question?
The question now isn't who's on first or what's on second? The question now is where is safe?
Two of my poem's. "Ketchup" and "job related stress". I spent 17 hours doing the audio in the 60 second piece. The video is thrown together I'm a sound man. But consider every roof in the video I roofed by myself. Well me and my dog Sparky wags.
This is my test of the electronic publication system. Tests, if we can relate.
My words to your feelings. This is only my test. Pass it on.
four of my poems from my kindle books are featured. narrated by me mixed with
Smashing pumpkins music. !
You might notice my videos are full of a bunch of roofs. My grandpa Danny was from Poland his last name is radjenski. He couldn't read but made up for it by having a great work ethic.
"Learn you a trade" he would say "something to fall back on". I'm afraid of heights but I some how ended up being really good at roofing. Mark Edwards from Irish hills construction swears I have mountain goat in my blood, But the best comparison I heard last year. From an old man who lived next door to the house I was roofing. He told me "Your like a little kid on a great big pile of sand." "Thank you" I told him."You only appreciate it because you watched me do it all by myself." It was 100 degrees on the ground. I left sparky home in the A/C a couple days. I bet we've roofed 100 houses together but he still don't do anything. He knows when it's lunch and when it's time to go home. I don't have to chain him up on a job. He stays right under me. Watching me. He's been on one or two roofs. I think he realizes the danger . I tell him "If I fall grab my phone and call for help."
When I worked at the radio station. I didn't make enough money to depend on just my radio salary.
I had to go to work after work. And I know roofing So I talked on the air about certain jobs I was doing. It was a perk to the job. "Irish hills construction, Million builders, Walsh builders." They wanted to hear their names on the radio so I gave mentions to whose roof I was doing. At the radio station they kept firing people. Tell me their job was my job now. pretty soon I didn't have time to roof on the side and radio didn't pay any more so I had to let it go. When the building trade collapsed work got thin.
I started going to church right between 2006, 2007. Easter It was pre spring. like a February thaw when I wrote "Early February maybe May". I started writing it in early February. I grew in faith as birds came back. Trees and flowers bud and blossomed.With no title yet I finished it maybe May. Ever since then I have great hope for my opportunities in February.During March I hope maybe May. Maybe May I open up and flourish. After May I have to wait again until early February.
"Learn you a trade to fall back on" I enjoy being on a roof. any one who has watched me will tell you "He sings and sh-t up there." Tries to sing I Belt. Any way I don't know that any one but me hopes the weather will break and I'll get a chance to roof a house. Just me and my dog. (what happens in April?)
"DAM IT"
No matter how bad it seems.
It could be worse.
Like when you cut yourself and
Don't bleed.
You just know "IT HURTS".
bob jenkens
Have you ever gashed yourself? Look at it so fast you see white meat?
Think for a second "at least it's not bleeding"? Then the gash fills in with blood you lift my hand and the blood runs down my arm dripping from my elbow. Damit!
I write in one of those black and white composition books. Always use a pencil but never the eraser. I scribble circle things and start over allot. I wrote this while working at mix 102.5 in Adrian Mi. On one of those little sticky notes. It never had a title until I put it in my little black book.
This was just another test trying to get a link to my Author page at Amazon Author Central.
COMPUTER FRIENDLY is an oxymoron!
If you believe the impossible, The incredible can come true. So says Kevin Costner in his 1988 film "Field Of Dreams". He sacrifices all financial stability tilling his crops under to build a baseball field with a miniature grandstand and a ghost baseball team that comes from the home run end of a corn field. Although he's threatened with foreclosure and loosing every thing he still risks every thing to still leave the farm to chase after a writer whose pulled from society and living in the city. He brings the writer back to the farm the "Field of Dreams". He never writes a story. Regardless people start showing up. I don't know how every one's gonna sit in that little grand stand.
If you write it they will come!!! If you believe the impossible, the incredible can come true.
If you write it they will come... I haven't done any drastic measures to promote my kindle book "will write for food". I have put myself out there. I might have picked a better poem to be page one had I known it was going to be a sample of what was in the book. I put it first because that is the first poem I've ever written.
It didn't have a title for the longest time. Then I considered "WHY" did I write this?
"WHY"
I have no doubt in my mind
Someday I will affect the lives
of many people in a positive way
Someday my life will open up
and flourish
That's why I survive.
I wrote this piece in southern Michigan prison. It was like 25 years ago. I was wanting to just die. Did you know it's hard to kill yourself even in prison. I knew God was using this experience to teach me something or maybe even to get me to write. Still surviving anticipating a bloom.
I know Iv'e made a difference in a few peoples lives, I exspect the best is comming.
When I was little and fell, I'd get back up it's natural. I may have cried. Maybe my mom ran over and dusted me off or I just shook it off. I never considered staying down. I never realized how getting back up would translate into starting all over at life weather it be a career change, an accident, a life threatening illness or even fallen into our Judicial System. I admire people that can put all their faith in God. People who's faith is so strong it's like nothing worries them. I'm not like that at all. Last Sunday I read liturgy at Mass at St Mary's. Father Paul wasn't feeling well (prayers 4 him) so Father Joe officiated. Father Joe's a younger man.. he'll thank me for saying that. He's great wears a beanie and rides a Harley. During father Joe's Homily he admitted he was a worrier. Says he worries all the time. How can this be? I see him Love his life running from one church to the other doing Mass in two different towns on Sunday. He gives most of his time to Sacred Heart in Hudson.
I've spoke there to. Actually I was asked to talk on Pentecostal Saturday about five years ago. Only I didn't realize the importance of this day. When we got there the church was absolutely packed. And I volunteered to get up and read a play. I studied and prepared but I have issues with anxiety and just before things get started I'm always worried. Everything went fine when I did my reading I scanned the eyes in every pew. There was no body who wasn't listening to me. Turns up this Saturday event is a day for confession. Automatically I see an opportunity to confess to a Father I didn't know that didn't know me.. Am I wrong? I didn't want my church to know I've been in prison.
I beat up on myself as I confessed to him.... I seem to have given up... I told him how I've been in prison. For a fist fight I got into when I was only 18 years old. I got out and went straight to the Specs Howard school of broadcast arts.
I confessed I feel an importance in my life to prevent this from happening to other young people... I'm not sure how I expected a radio career to do this. (I talked to thousands of people.) I told him I use to feel important. I've planned and orchestrated food drives filling rental trucks with food. Food that was going to feed families that were gonna be hungry without it. I Spoke at school functions. Now I'm a dumb roofer. ( I Love being on a roof but it's not glamorous.) I remember his face golden hazel eyes and silver hair nodding toward the podium I had spoke from. "Why did you get up there and do that?" he asked referring to my reading. Because they asked me to I replied.( there were about eight other readings that day). He told me I should be an actor or something. That he watched my eyes as I spoke to every single person in the church. He told me "Quit beating up on yourself If God wants you on the radio that's where you'll be". He told me "Just Do what God Asks".
. I'm not the sharpest tool in the shed. I'm not the guy without worries. I worry myself sick. I wish God would ask me to do something and give me an instruction booklet. I can follow directions so I use my free will to do what I think is right. I seem to always get knocked down. I've started over so many times. I get back up. I don't mean to preach. It is Lent. A time to do something specific in regard to personal spiritual renewal.
I had Gavin handed to me by child protective service just months after. Father told me "do what God asks you to do".
I was emotional that day in just waiting to get to my confession station. I Knew I had a baby on the way from a relationship my church would not approve of. The Mother wanted to abort the baby and I was against it. Sometimes I wish I'd never met her but at the same time wonder where me and Gavin would be without each other. During her Pregnancy she would call me and demand money for an abortion.
I write poems about things I don't know why. During this period I wrote "Pro Life". /pro-life.html
I must of drove two hundred miles today. I know it would never work but to bad I couldn't write while I drove. Not like texting and driving that's crazy. I'm just saying my mind can write 6 chapters I'd like to write. 20 minutes at 63 mph. Then there's a chapter break. 35 back this way behind a school bus stopping over and over. Wish I could record my thoughts.... wouldn't that be scary.
Today being Ash Wednesday Jesus and his disciples were headed into the Passover. Jesus knew his fate. God told him you will be given up so that all mans Sins may be forgiven. Jesus didn't run off he gave his self up..Peter Simon struck a guard and cut off his ear in the garden, Protecting Jesus. Jesus told him put his sword down. And I think he put the dudes ear back on. I wish I had been there. I'm not an evangelist, I've only been going to church for about 8 years. Today while I was driving I was thinking back to when I worked at the radio station Paczki's were a jelly donuts on fat Tuesday. I remember announcing on the air Something about it being "Good Wednesday" and I called "Ash Friday". My listeners called me and corrected me. I felt dumb. better get my Ash to Church.. Oh ya almost forgot why I posted this... You don't need an invitation to go to Church. I attend St Mary's of the lakes "all are welcome".
I didn't grow up with any religious up bringing.
I admire people that have all the trust in God. They give credit to any recognition in their life to their God.
My life is painted with Gods purpose for me. Even if I don't see. He Loves me just the same.
Feeling I needed change in my life I quit waiting for someone to open me up to God. I Started going to a couple different local churches. I felt a belonging at St. Mary's. The Pastoral Coordinator was a woman with a beautiful high spirit God Bless you Jean. She walked me through RICA I went through rite of recognition and feel right at home. Just going to church does not entitle you to some basket of blessings. Of course I'm still thankful for my days and my opportunities. I'm not a wealthy person. I have more time than money.
What I try to give to the church is my time. I don't like to see insecure people on ladders. So I can think of three Easters and Christmases that I decorated the church. I helped I did the high stuff. I read liturgy during mass. My voice is a tool. Parishioners will tell me "I can't not listen to you". I Love being an Alter server and being right on the Alter while Father Paul does his Homily. I've worked with Father Paul washing peoples feet just like Jesus did before the last supper. Three years I organized the Diocesan Service Appeal fund raiser. Though I had no substantial contribution to the fund I told my fellow parishioners you are my family so I need not feel bad to ask you for money. lol
Wednesday Is Ash Wednesday and I haven't scribbled any Lenten plans. Their in my head along with this story I need to tell but don't no where to start. Today I started reading Scripture again. I've been raising this baby by myself and just getting him to not be crazy during mass is hard. I think if he starts seeing me talk he'll realize the importance.
I really needed someone to come to church with me to help me. I put an s.o.s out on my face book page. only 1 friend commented and she had obligations. It occurred to me. I don't preach to any of my friends.
I don't try to get my mom to come or my dad. People you would want to be saved.
That's my Lenten plans. Everything for the Glory of God. I've been an in the closet Christian.
I'll tell you right now you do not need an invitation to go to church. Peace be to you.
